so it's been like a year since i posted in this blog... a friend of mine has inspired me to begin blogging again about my life, more as a journal than anything else. it was when I had shared a link with her to my blog that I actually started to read the damned thing again. I scrolled all the way back to the first entry and found that the posts contained such disheartening content about my situation that I had to rethink my life. I have been divorced around 4 to 6 months now, living in my tiny hovel in Rolla. I pay child support in a handsome sum, and refuse to not live in some fashion that reflects how hard I've worked and what it took me just to get here. Internet, dish tv and the like. My son Brett, 25, has moved out to stay with me! He's a wonderful man and I cannot express just how amazing it is to be around him as an adult. He's very intelligent and gentle in every way. I love him so. I have fallen behind in my bills, rent car payment and others, and am facing bankruptcy just to keep the creditors at bay. I have applied for help from a couple agencies set up to help retirees supplement their finances with donated funds, as I await the outcome of my disability claim with the VA. God I hope they help me out! I hate being broke and overdrawn by the 10th of every month!!!